Falling patterns
No matter how much of a well put together adult I might seem to outsiders I occationally fall into the bad trap of old familiar habits. When something pushes a little too hard I close up and shut down. Lessons that have taken me a lifetime to learn are sometimes forgotten during just the course of an evening. But it's bliss! It's wonderful!
I'd say I only have a couple of more good years in me, then I have to surrender and be a more mature person, like um, actually do something with my life. I had a conversation about that last night. Not sure I exactly got any wiser, but it's amazing what comes to mind to say when you're laying down next to the warmth of another. Some minds never sieze to amaze me. And thank the nonexistant God for that!
Also, I was looking through a scrapbook I made for Snowball, quite a few years ago. I can see in the pictures just how sick he was, he looks like a ruffled baby bird on cocaine. I worked really hard for that creature, and I get paid back for it every single day. There's nothing that makes me more proud than knowing that there's a ball of fluff that loves me almost as much as I love him.
But anyway. about falling into old patterns. Some of them I'm a bit unaware of myself. But let's put it this way, I think there's a reason the Yellow wallpaper let's her get so absorbed by a wallpaper. There's something hypnotizing in looking at them for hours on end.
I'd say I only have a couple of more good years in me, then I have to surrender and be a more mature person, like um, actually do something with my life. I had a conversation about that last night. Not sure I exactly got any wiser, but it's amazing what comes to mind to say when you're laying down next to the warmth of another. Some minds never sieze to amaze me. And thank the nonexistant God for that!
Also, I was looking through a scrapbook I made for Snowball, quite a few years ago. I can see in the pictures just how sick he was, he looks like a ruffled baby bird on cocaine. I worked really hard for that creature, and I get paid back for it every single day. There's nothing that makes me more proud than knowing that there's a ball of fluff that loves me almost as much as I love him.
But anyway. about falling into old patterns. Some of them I'm a bit unaware of myself. But let's put it this way, I think there's a reason the Yellow wallpaper let's her get so absorbed by a wallpaper. There's something hypnotizing in looking at them for hours on end.
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